Come on Get Higher
by FluffyGoldFish
Summary: Destiel! When God returned, Castiel left instantly without a goodbye and he left a freshly broken Dean who craved something more and more each second Castiel was gone.
1. Dean

**Okay, so I am taking a stab at a Destiel that is supposed to be sad.. I might have failed cause I'm a happy person DX**  
><strong>I do not own anything to do with Supernatural but I do wanna take credit for this fantasy of mine... I wish this would happen in the show.. (I mean just an episode of Destiel :D) <strong>

**Enjoy! :) **

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><p><strong>Come on Get Higher<strong>

He remembered the moment the angel disappeared more clearly than the apocalypse. Dean remembered how Castiel's face lit up in happiness and how right before he shed the vessel, he looked at him. Sadness filled his bright blue eyes, and Castiel left Jimmy's body and that was the last time Dean saw his angel.

When Jimmy was left over, Dean felt a warmth inside him fade and was replaced by a coldness. He knew that feeling; he had felt it most of his life; loneliness. He had lost another thing that he loved and this feeling had to take the cake on the worst feel he had ever felt.

Maybe it was the fact that Castiel had been devoted to him alone and would do anything for him. Maybe it had been the fact that no matter how bad Dean messed up, Castiel would save him again and again. And maybe, just maybe, it was the fact that once his father had returned and fixed the broken world, Castiel left him. No goodbye, just a sad glance before he left forever.

Dean knew that he would never be able to forget the way Castiel would stare confused when he didn't understand human slang; how he would always be there at the right moment; and how he had seen more than just a sinner inside him. He had once called Dean beautiful, his soul.

Shaking his head, Dean choked back the last of the beer in his bottle before heading to the kitchen to get another. Castiel had been wrong; Dean's soul was anything but beautiful. It was torn and broken. It had a nasty taste for revenge and trust had been burned out completely from it. Along with love.

Dean knew that the only people he could ever love, were the ones he already had. He loved Sam more than he cared for himself and would do anything for him, and had gone to Hell to prove it. Bobby, because he was just like his father and proved that with sacrifice and by disciplining him on more than one occasion. His parents had been the first loves he had ever had, but none of them compared to the most important person.

Castiel.

He had somehow, in some fucked up way, fallen for the angel. In the war and meetings between the two, Dean had grown soft and let the angel in. He had trusted him with his life and would even trust him with Sam's life. He had also loved him more than he should have. Dean had known that Castiel couldn't love him like he so desired, but he couldn't stop.

It had surprised Dean when he pin-pointed the feeling he had for the angel. Dean the ladies-man was gay for Castiel, an angel. Dean knew that God was trying to teach His angel's to learn to love the humans like He loved the humans but that was different from what Dean felt. In the early morning light, Dean finally gave up. One year after his angel disappeared, Dean finally amitted to himself that Castiel wasn't coming back.

And Castiel hadn't loved him like he had desperately wanted.

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><p>Only small hunts were left after God resurfaced. Sam went back to college while Dean and Bobby continued to hunt ghosts and things that were left over from the war. Dean had become very dependent on alcohol afterwards too. Every night before he went to bed, he drank till he couldn't walk and just stared at the ceiling before he passed out in his hotels beds.<p>

His dreams consisted of Castiel and a family. Sam would bring his children and wife to Dean and Castiel's house and Dean would watch as Sam's children would braid his angel's hair while his angel would look helpless. Bobby would sit in the old rocking chair and tell stories to the children who had heard it many times before and they would have a border collie for a pet.

That was why he drank himself to sleep most nights. If he did, the dreams didn't come and he wouldn't feel empty in the morning; well as empty. A year after Castiel was gone and he still burned a candle for him. It was pathetic.

He wouldn't ever move on either because in his mind, Castiel might come back and he wouldn't betray his angel.

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><p><strong>I think I am going to make this a 3-shot... maybe... I wanna do Castiel's POV and then the future.. Did I fail miserably at being sad? DX<strong>

**Oh and the title is this song.. Actually my favorite song ATM. Come on Get Higher by Matt Nathanson..**

**Anyone wanna make a Destiel video with this song? It would make my day! :D**

**Review? Subscribe?**

_-Courtney_


	2. Castiel

He had felt the exact moment that his father returned from his absence. A warmth filled Castiel and a warm beckoning called him to return to the place he once called home. Eyes stared at him and he turned his head to see Dean's face contort to confusion. A sadness filled Castiel before he shed his human vessel and returned to his father.

All of his lost brothers and sisters were gathered together, all around their father. Bowing down to Him, they rose and awaited orders. They had become so dependent on their father most couldn't think for themselves. When Castiel was close enough to see his father, he too bowed and rose in submission.

His father's eyes followed him alone and silence was met around the group. No one spoke as they stared at each other. Castiel's father had removed the souls he had taken inside and replaced him with purity when he returned, but Castiel didn't understand why he was forgiven. To take or proclaim yourself a god above the Father was the worst mistake.

"Return to your duties," the Fathers voice sang through their ears and angels departed instantly. "You are to stay, Castiel."

In mere seconds they were left alone and Castiel bowed again in submission. "You proclaimed yourself greater than Me," his father's voice accused.

Nodding in shame, Castiel dared to look upon his father's form. No anger was noted, but Castiel wasn't one to be awarded for reading emotions. "I did."

Silence bored on for minutes until He spoke, "You must be punished for such a lapse in judgment. You, Castiel, are an angel of the Lord and you fell to that of human standards."

"I did," Castiel paused. "For my crimes against You, what is to be my punishment?"

His Father didn't respond for a few moments, until Castiel nearly collapsed from nervousness. "You are to stay within the sky until I say. No contact with humans and no messages."

Castiel nearly argued that he needed to let the Winchesters know he was safe, but bit his tongue. Nodding and accepting his punishment, Castiel departed from his Father and returned to his duties of over looking the earth.

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><p>For days, Castiel watched as the brothers drove apart from each other and as Dean swallowed himself into a pit of alcoholism. Surprisingly, Dean didn't decorate himself in whores and make sin of the flesh, which confused the angel greatly. His hunter had always been one to take what he needed, yet he withdrew from his normal pleasures.<p>

He watched as Dean and Bobby hunted the remaining demons and as Sam returned to school to finish his schooling for law. Sam broke down his walls and met a woman named Tiffany who was soon to be Tiffany Winchester. It had been almost two years since he returned to his home, yet he craved to walk on the earth again with his hunter and friends. No, his family.

Castiel was once a part of their little family, but no longer was he welcome. Dean had seemed to forget the angel and didn't pray to him after the first year. No one seemed to remember the blue-eyed angel that watched over them at all times.

It came suddenly, three years after his punishment began. He was watching Dean and Bobby work a hunt when they were ambushed. Dean was knocked unconscious and dragged away from a disoriented Bobby. Dean was then chained and tormented with tools of the world and of the flesh. Castiel watched as it went on for a few hours until he stopped and appeared before his Father. Without words, Castiel watched as a warmth encased him.

A burning sensation filled his body and an impact with the dirt woke him from the daze. He was inside his old vessel, but it was different. It was like it was him, but he knew that this form was nothing like his true form. Breaking from his inventory of himself, he appeared mere feet from Dean and his torturer. Grabbing the demon by the back of the head, he exercised it and freed Dean's body from the chains. Dean collapsed to the ground in a heap of flesh and bones.

Castiel touched his shoulder and healed him before sending him back to Bobby's house in a flash. Castiel then appeared in front of the confused Bobby and did the same to him, then the Impala. Checking the perimeters for any more unworldly presences, he too departed to Bobby's house where the two had taken seats at the table and were apparently waiting for him.

A warm feeling spread though his body and he knew it was his father encouraging him to stay for as long as need be. Except, he didn't want to stay when Dean said his name. It took all his strength to leave his feet planted on the rotting floorboards of Bobby's house.

"Hello, Dean," he mumbled through his lips.

The two stared at him in shock, "Where the Hell have you been Cas?"

He didn't know how to respond to the question. Wasn't it obvious that he had been with his Father? "With my father."

"No shit. I mean, why didn't you let us know that you were safe and alive?" Dean growled out.

Castiel noticed then that Dean had gotten older. Gray hairs were sprinkled throughout his hair and frown lines crossed his face. "I wasn't to interact with humans or yourselves within the last years."

"What?" Dean said stupidly.

"I was being punished for my actions that insulted Father and it was me being stuck inside the perimeters of heaven that proved to be adequate. He relieved me of my punishment moments before I reappeared to you."

"So, this entire time, you have been watching us without being able to interact?" Bobby barked out.

"Yes. I witnessed Sam getting engaged and Dean's pickled liver and your health declining," Castiel stated.

Dean seemed to be embarrassed at his comment about him, but hid it with a scowl. "Dean you can't be angry at him if it was beyond his control," Bobby growled when Dean was about to snap something.

They were encased in silence until Castiel spoke, "Your age seems to have doubled in the three years, Dean. Stress isn't good for human bodies."

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><p><strong>Hello! Thanks for reading the next chapter! I think this is pretty good for trying to be sad a bit. I didn't want Dean to totally forgive him cause I don't think he would so easily. Anywho. I believe that there will be one more chapter and then all done! :D<strong>

**Review? Subscribe?**

**-Courtney.**


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